right now i feel alone , isolated from society with many insecurities.

ive had a unfortunate hard life filled with trauma, because of this ive missed out on the normal things that a person does : forming any relationships, having a life – achieving an education and qualifications.
was diagnosed with bpd personality disorder with ptsd traits 2 years ago, suffered and still suffer with the symptoms of ; high anxiety panic problems, struggle with aggression and rage , very low self esteem ; agoraphobia been isolated from society for many years.. ; struggle social to form friendships , maintain conversations , have very low self esteem.

used to have countless rage outbursts in public years ago, impulsive aggression, but ive managed it well for years.

been very lucky, because of rage i lashed out at people in public, been attacked myself, cautioned by the police in the past – the rage comes from years of bottled up anger in adolescence where i suffered taunts and mental bullying.

people in my local community are still cold and aloof and treat me as an outcast, their distant from me , like they have for many, many years , but ive tried to carry on and ignore it…

in the present i live in a one bedroom flat in the north of england on disability, owning hardly any possessions, reliant on the mental health services for support…………they dont have the therapy i want because of lack of resources ( individual psychotherapy ) so im having to take what their offering which is ( occupational therapy to integrate me back into society ) because ive been isolated , alienated from society half my life.

i have a criminal and psychiatric record, criminal record going back 7 years ago, spent time in a mental hospital for 18 months in 2000.

to be honest iam desperate for a life and happiness, a career, meaningful relationships, security , stability , to achieve my goals in life of a decent computer job and to move away from england , live abroad someplace near a coast, with a wife etc..

im desperate for all this, things ive never achieved because of my unfortunate life.
i act desperate for people friendship, and my severe low esteem frightens people away or they reject me.

and how will i achieve the things i desire in life when iam so far behind everybody else at many disadvantages ? ?

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I was having trouble with my computer and ended up unistalling my virus scanner. Now my computer is running extremely slow and will not allow me to re-install or install a different scanner. I think that it must have a virus, but have no way to tell. I have deleted all my cookies and temporary files which did not help. Now I am stuck with a slow computer and possibly a virus and no way to get rid of it. HELP!!!
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thanks for viewing the question !
I use desktop for personal purposes at home, so dont have a clear knowledge about the various latest spy software,viruses and things like them. I got to know about key logger recently, so felt the need to protect my system.
could u please tell about any software which provides over all protection from hackers ad spies? links for their free download !
please also tell abt the latest viruses and spy software..and how to detect them?

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Now, i’m installing kaspersky anti virus in my computer but it requires the removal of comodo internet security( which i had installed earlier and uninstalled afterwards). the add or remove programs function does not show this program neither does the program files in C. so, how should i remove it so that i can install kaspersky?

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